If there’s one thing we’ve always suspected, and the internet has proven, it’s that sexual fantasies are as varied as the human population. -and that, thanks to Google, it’s easy to find like-minded folk if you want others to join in. Animals, corporate offices, emo bands — you name it, and somewhere out there, someone is getting a pants-stain just thinking about it.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m no prude. I’ve had sex plenty of times, and at least once or twice with another person. But my fantasies are no match for some old dude playing Nazi-themed leather spanky games with five hookers.

(As Formula 1 cars lack back seats, I suppose this was the next best thing for him? Kudos to the tabloids for no “get your motor running” or “stick shift” jokes. )

Costumes? Foreign languages? Play-acting? Oh for fuck’s sake… How sad must your life be, when plain old Getting Your Freak On no longer satisfies… To do my part, I’m going to go watch some good old-fashioned guy-on-girl (on girl on guy on girl on girl on girl) porn and rejoice the simple things.

This entry was posted on Monday, April 7th, 2008 at 21:48:34 and is filed under Seen and Heard. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.