FatMans recently enjoyed the rare occasion to spend a gift certificate at mid-scale kitchen-bit store Crate & Barrel, also known as the Williams Sonoma of malls in slightly crappier parts of town. But, some of the products he saw at this supposedly innocent houseware emporium shook him to the core:

Depending on who’s doing the rubbing (and where), this could be rather pleasant. Still, we would expect the Rub Away Bar from Ikea and those lusty Swedes, but good ol’ C ‘n B? That’s not very family values. Good thing Mass is already a gay-marriage state and therefore has not only lost but crushed under its wing-tipped heel any sort of moral compass…

More shocking Eurogarbage from a heartland company based in Northbrook, Ill. Although, who among us wouldn’t enjoy a nice Nordic White Spreader on a cold winter’s night? Maybe with a Rub Away Bar? As for the Lobster Cracker, that sounds like a pasty English yob who’s spent too much time in the sun at a footy match. Look for some Lobster Crackers at Euro 2008 this summer.

Well, now, this is just vile. Here we’ve just celebrated Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s legacy, and we find C ‘n B selling a corkscrew that promotes segregation? Disgusting. We’ve already sent the e-mail to Al Sharpton. This just takes the concept of being racy way too far.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 23rd, 2008 at 15:39:36 and is filed under General. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.